Thanksgiving

WORK WORK WORK

It’s not the most fun but you have to make a living. I’ve been covering for a manager on paternity leave and working 84 hours/2 weeks. My paycheck for 64 hours compared to 84 hours is only $450…. Those extra 4 hours of overtime is only $5/hr more than my normal pay. In the end, I am earning less per hour than normal. The more that I work, the less I get paid per hour. Also I’m burned out and all I want to do is spend time with bae.

Welcome to the holiday spirit where people are animals and the mall is a dangerous place. I was finding a parking spot and saw a guy backing out. I turned on my blinker and a guy in front comes around the corner and sees this spot and swerves into it and steals it. RUUUUUUDE! I turned the next corner and there’s like a ton more spots on the upper level. So what the heck… I’ve lost my faith in humanity long ago. The more I interact with people, the less I want to live in this world.

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Thanksgiving was fun this year! My gf was in the Philippines last year so this was the first year we got to celebrate together. Lots of food with my family and she’s in the Family Secret Santa! Friday we went bowling for the first time and that was super fun. Saturday we watched Justice League and celebrated my bro’s birthday at home with cheesecake. Then Sunday it was Bae’s dad’s birthday and went to eat hot pot and have this awesome banana cream pie cake. Thanks for the amazing weekend, love you!

On top of work, I’m trying to work out and burn off these calories… I’ve got a long ways to go.

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We Gucci

Ok, she over-reacted. It took her awhile but we’re ok now. Didn’t quite feel the same at first, but I think we’re doing better. We’ve put God closer to the center of our relationship to bring healing and grace to us. We do our best to have Bible study sessions and pray for our meals together.

After that fiasco, she’s now gone for 7 days on a cruise with her work friends. I didn’t realize how much I miss her until she left. But then she kept calling me while I’m trying to go on with my day and I’m like 😡 But now I miss her again. 😦

It’s 10pm and normally this is the time we’d call each other and chill before going to bed. But I might just go sleep early. I spent the whole day playing games, listening to music, reading articles, and browsing the internet. Leg day the other day was intense and I am so sore. But hey, starting tomorrow I am working 4x 10 hours, 1 day off, and another 4 days and then I see her again! It would be nice though to have someone to talk with about my day or during my lunch time or after a long day, ya know.

Missing you!

???

We’ve been together for almost 2 years and I have a dark past that I don’t want to open up about. We’re going through self-help books and Christian books and I’m getting ready to propose. Then she sends me a religious video about why you should open up about your past and be vulnerable. The girl in the video showing grace and humility. So I did. And the opposite was shown. Negativity and judgment. No forgiveness, no chances. Just ending it. A break up. All because of what happened in my past before I met her.

 

She removed and blocked me from all social media and wants to give back my stuff.

And she’s going back on Tinder.

 

?????

Well that escalated quickly.

Learning to Adult

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I think I’m starting to get the hang of this “adulting” thing down, but not really. I’m having fat days and skinny days with no muscle, haha. My gf thinks I’m on my period and being hormonal. It has been a very long time since my last update and basically I’ve been working and being together with the gf. Things have progressed along smoothly with her. We’ve been pushing each other to grow as individuals and together as a couple. We’ve read self-help books on relationships and dating. Most of them are written from a Christian-based perspective and it makes total sense. This is the kind of relationship I’ve always wanted. Due to these books, we’ve become highly aware of our communication level and how we each perceive what love is. One of the books I recommend reading is The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Basically there are 5 love languages – Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Gifts, and Physical Touch. We all show and receive love differently and this book has helped me understand my gf better.

These past couple weeks we started doing Bible study sessions together. Roughly once a week or so, we have this outlined guide that we were given by the church we go to that has chapters to study and read from. It asks questions and we go through it together as a couple. Back in college, I was part of a Asian Christian club on campus called Epic and I remember how great my peers were and how they are so God-driven in their lives. Some of them got together and were the perfect couple that placed God first in their lives. I look at my own life and think that I could never have that or be that. Then this girl comes along and changes my perspective. I’m nowhere near where I want to be spiritually, but at least I feel driven to try and be a good Christian.

So for a time, my gf and I were on opposite weekends with hardly any time in the week to see each other. Our schedules just did not match. And ever since my last update, we’ve been put on the same weekends (yay!). But now my regular store is no longer 24 hours so they had to move people around and cut my position so I would float around (like the rest of my cohort) and it also no longer put me on the same weekend as my gf (boo!).

In terms of my fitness goals, I am struggling like no other. But I am still happy that I am able to spend time at the gym a few times each week. The last time I’ve made gains was back in 2015 but I know that isn’t the last time. Life is a journey and I’m definitely in my slumps but hey I’m also enjoying the best days of my life (ie, good food and desserts).

Also I was in Chicago for like 3 days in August. That was fun 😀 In the meantime, I’m trying to adult more by cooking. I’m cooking pasta with shrimp but don’t know where my mom put the shrimp so I’m updating you all while I wait for her to come back… Yes, I’m 27 and I still live at home. #120KInLoans

Life Goals

Just been thinking a lot lately about my life goals. Now that I’m done with school and starting that working life, it’s a different feeling and a different mindset. There’s no set schedule of going to school Mon-Fri with tests to study for and homework to do. Back in college, I felt more alive than I ever did coming back home. I have this sense that I should move out but how could I when I’m in so much debt. I could save this money I’m making from work and move out when I’m ready. I’m paying off my loans at a vastly fast pace and also saving up for a house.

Back in school, it was simple. You move on to the next year until you get that degree. But what happens after is real life. There’s no one telling you what your goals are. There’s no more sense of direction on what you should do with your career, your life, etc. I don’t have a set schedule and so I can’t set up a routine. I’m left with my own physical mindset and school did not prepare me for what’s after. In terms of my job, that is fine. But in terms of being real with the world, it’s scary as heck.

In general, I’m in a slump. I feel physically weak and stagnant in life. I’m also mentally and emotionally weak. All this social media makes me want to just click the next thing and fast forward to the end. Imagine trying to do cardio for 10 mins! Sometimes I barely even make it not because I physically can’t, but because I mentally can’t do it anymore. I want to do other things. Nowadays, I don’t even want to be in the gym. Idk if it’s because I don’t know anybody and working out just sucks or if it’s because I’m mentally weak and all I want to do is go home and play games or sleep or rest.

This is where life has gotten me. I need to take a step back and re-evaluate what’s important to me. I was just listening to a TedTalk on the 7 deadly sins and I believe it is a very important concept which I had forgotten about.

Lust. Gluttony. Greed. Sloth. Wrath. Envy. Pride.

No one is perfect but I believe everyone can strive to be. Lately the two common crimes are Sloth and Gluttony. Gluttony because I indulge and overeat in excess. This is my reason for feeling guilty about not going to the gym more and depressed over my mood. Normally I am very fit and have had zero feelings about how fat I am. But man, I feel like stabbing myself in the gut. Sloth is the feeling of laziness and leaving your responsibilities. Maybe you do them but you’re indifferent and you mentally dissociate yourself with the tasks. I feel like I have a weak mentality. All I want to do is rest or find rest with my mind whether it be sleeping, playing games, or even being with my significant other. We should be pushing each other, not becoming idle and stagnant.

I’ve got a long ways to go and my mentality needs to make a change or I’ll forever remain the same.

Birthday!

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Another year gone by and this time it’s gone faster than ever! I’m currently on a 10 day vacation just being at home. I didn’t plan to go anywhere because I’m not the type of person to travel alone or plan things well. I’m a very calculated person and would want to know everything before going and also a companion for someone to consult or bounce ideas off of. So this year I was working the night before my birthday and went to the gym after work and stayed there past midnight. So I was essentially hanging out at the bar(bells) and having a drink (protein shake) on my birthday lol. The day of my birthday I played some games and went to a buffet with my family. The day after I spent time with the gf and we exchanged gifts. She got me some sweet looking Ray Ban’s (pictured above), I love them!

During the gym session, I was doing some deadlifts and next morning my back was dead. Felt like a strain or something and I’ve been trying to stretch and shake it off for the last 4 days but it’s still been killing me. Ever since, I’ve been taking it easy. I think that’s the last time I’m going to deadlift anything remotely heavy. It may have seemed my strength is past its peak and I feel washed up in terms of my fitness goals. I’m nowhere near what I was back then at my golden age of 24. But I don’t believe it will end. Fitness is a long term journey and there will be ups and downs and I’m going to fall off the wagon many times, but I will always keep getting back up. My body is getting older and feels rusty, but I need to train smarter, not only inside the gym but outside. I’ve been trying to outwork my bad diet but I’ve learned that it can’t be done.

Part of me is excited about the challenge and another part of me feels like it’s impossible. Living at home makes things 10x harder since this household is not setup for fitness. My mom just bought 2 boxes of Waffle Syrup Oreos and 2 boxes of Double Stuffed Oreos. :O On top of the endless junk in the house too. I tried cooking eggs this morning only to find out there’s only 1 egg left in the carton. My mom comes home later and says the rest are in the fridge in the garage, not the closer one that I checked, but the farthest one.

Last night I quit League of Legends because I’ve been on an extremely bad losing spree. I have a 15% win rate for the past 4-5 months in my games and I felt like I just had enough of it last night. So I uninstalled the game. Maybe I’ll reinstall and get back into it cuz today I felt like there’s nothing to do and I spent my whole day looking for other games to play but all I want to play is League. Ugh, the addiction is real.

My vacation is halfway done and I was going to use this time to train hard but with my back out of commission I’m just coasting through this vacation just chilling and going on hikes with the gf. I felt like I was going to do a lot in 2017 but maybe 2018 will be it. T___T At least work is alright (crappy schedule but money is money) and I’ve got more than 1/3 of my loans paid off in less than a year! Living at home has its perks 🙂

PLACES TO GO, THINGS TO SEE! Here’s to another year of fun-filled adventures with this lovely girl.

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Road Trip

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We decided to hit the road and see what adventure awaits. This was just a day trip. We went to Seattle, WA. I’ve gone through many things with this girl and yet here we are still together. Every day with her is an adventure. She loves to be out there and travel often.

Our first stop was to Jollibee in Tukwila, WA. Jollibee is a Filipino fast food restaurant. We had fried chicken, spaghetti with cheese, fiesta noodles, and her favorite peanut sauce with some pork meat. And of course her favorite peach mango pie, which I ate mine at the start and she saved hers for later. And then I ate hers when I got home XD. That’s how I know she loves me. Afterwards we bought some baked goods around the mall from Red Ribbon Bakery and another pastry place and picked up some sponge cake and ube pastries (purple yam). Our next stop was Dr Jose Rizal Park as shown above.

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Then we went to the famous places like Pike Market Place and Gum Wall. Upon walking up to this, she pulls out a piece of gum from her pocket and I was thinking “Where did that come from??” Looks like she was well-prepared. After chewing for less than a minute, she placed her mark on the wall.

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Oh man, silly me. I am never looking at the camera. The reason why I never look at the camera is because my eyes are always on her. *D’awwwww*

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Next on the list is the first Starbucks Coffee place. That is me trying to make the number 1 and also pointing at the Starbucks window but now I look like I messed up the picture. Having a normal photo of me is rare.

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We concluded our food trip with dinner at Din Tai Fung in Seattle. Luckily we didn’t have to wait in line because it was just us two and there were tables available for us. My suggestions came from the Fung Bros Youtube review on DTF (Din Tai Fung, not the other dtf). Since it was just the two of us, we only chose 3 options – Xiao Long Bao, Shanghai Shu Mai, Spicy Wontons, and they were bomb AF (as flavorful). Those XLB’s were so good and we had such a fun time eating them. She knows how to savor food as well as I do. We saved the 2 best XLB’s for last. MMMMMM!

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And our last stop was back in Tukwila to buy some 85°C bakery. We didn’t know what the fuss was about or why it was good. We walked in and there were massive amounts of people in line and grabbing bakery items. There were no labels as to what the product was or how much it costs but I started picking out a few and by the end I wanted more of everything. After we paid, we had one later and it was the most delicious piece of bakery I’ve had! Look at that amazingness! Oh and the baked goods too. XD

I have to say a big thanks to T for driving. I had a closing shift the night before and was severely wrecked. I’m so sad that our schedules are not aligning. She tried to talk to management but it’s what she signed up for. Mine seems to be random but for some reason, the last month we’ve just been having completely opposite days off. It just so happens for the next 3 weeks I am working on all of her days off and she is working on all the days I’m off. That’s some really crummy scheduling. Last month we had a Eugene trip that I planned out. Maybe it won’t be until next month for our next adventure. I can’t wait. I’m going to turn into one of those people that has to do a countdown until the next time I get to see her even though we’re only like 40 mins away.

I love you and hope we have many more adventures together, near and far! ♥